Survival Sunday - The finale

The best day of the season? Maybe.


The best last day of the season for sometime? Definitely.


Survival Sunday is upon us. It's a wonderful day for top flight English football. All games are played at the same time for the only day of the season. There is real excitement and tension at either ends of the table with the title and top 4 still to be decided and the 3rd relegation spot still yet to be settled.


The situation is this.


If City win at home (where they've won 17 of 18 this season) against a battling QPR side (rancid away from Loftus Road this season) then the first title in the Premiership era (and for 44 years) will be theirs.


There's the hype of it being a 'grudge match' for Mark Hughes after his 'unethical'?! dismissal from the club half way through the 2009/10 season. Fergie wishes Sparky was playing against the club he once
managed, but instead it will be Bobby Zamora, Djibril Cisse and Jay Bothroyd standing in the way of the Champions to be...
Ferguson hopes that mirrors will help his United team lift the trophy. "If you analyse Mark Hughes as a player and manager, all his teams seem to mirror him.
"He was a warrior as a player and I wish he was playing. If his team can mirror him then you never know." Mirror, mirror on the wall.  The City fans will be going wild with excitement if their team take an early lead, but the longer it remains goaless the more the tension, and nerves will rise.  An early goal and the game and title is over, if QPR keep them quiet for an hour it could be a very intense finale.

United will do their best to batter Martin O'Neil's Sunderland at the Stadium of Light (which shouldn't be too hard seeing as Sunderland seemed to have reverted to how they played under Steve Bruce in the past month or so). The United game will only add pressure to the City match. These City players don't have the Premier League winners experience that United have, but it shouldn't really matter, QPR at home is an easy fixture to finish up with, and if you'd said to Roberto Mancini 8 games ago all they had to do on the last day is beat the R's at home, he would have licked his lips and flicked his quiff in delight.


Tottenham, Newcastle and Arsenal are all playing out their own mini-drama in the battle for the 3rd automatic Champions League spot (if Chelsea win against Bayern in a just over a week then 4th place won't mean dick). 4th place will probably be enough as Bayern should beat Chelsea at home in the final May 17th, but it's not worth the risk (and extra games, of finishing fourth and going through the preliminary rounds of the Champions League qualifying.


Tottenham will play Fulham at home, they should smash the Cottagers who have nothing at stake.  The Yids start the day in fourth but will hope to pip north London rivals Arsenal to 3rd to avoid more piss taking about the 'mind the gap' banter earlier in the season.

Arsenal will play WBA for the England's managers last game in charge.  West Brom aren't too bad at home against Arsenal and the Gunners might slip up here and end up in 4th.  Maybe a big performance from the West Brom players as a thank you and fair well to their gaffa, as well as a thank god that we don't have to get drilled so hard in practice from now on!  Wenger has looked nervous all season and I'm sure he'll be clutching his stomach at some stage as he sits in his sleeping bag jacket on the bench at the Hawthornes.  The result against Norwich last week could haunt the Arsenal, who will be playing for their dark tinted spec wearing assistant Pat Rice who is retiring as an Arsenal legend after this game.

Everton will host the other contenders Newcastle, who will fancy scoring at Goodison with Cisse and Ba up top, but will be weary of David Moyes side who hit form late every year and look strong at home.  This could be the last time Newcastle's team plays together before they get pillaged in the summer by 'big' clubs. Cabaye, Tiote, Ba, Krul, Cisse and Ben Arfa will be monitored closely by multiple clubs this summer who know that  Mike Ashley has no problem selling his best assets, and Pardew, the recently voted manager of the year, has already admitted some players may go this summer.  Newcastle have to win, and hope for a slip up from either London club, unlikely.

At the bottom Owen Coyle will be kicking every ball on the side lines (in his full kit with trainers - ODD LOOK!) as Bolton take on Stoke at home.  The Potters lost on the last day of last season to allow Wigan to stay up and the Trotters will hope for a repeat of that.  The 2 late goals conceded to West Brom last week will have kept Coyle up all night this week, but they know that QPR will probably get mullered at the Ethiad so know a win will see them through.  I fancy Stoke to do a number on them here, even though half the team is already on the beach, and one of their most motivated players of late has been Ricardo Fuller (which is saying something!!!)  I'd prefer QPR to stay up because I love the home support at Loftus Road, it's small, compact and a real football ground.  Bolton have been crap all season and without the awful Fabrice Muamba situation I don't think many would have much sympathy  for them if they did get the drop.  Coyle also talks like he needs a drink and has peanut butter stuck to the roof of his mouth which irritates me wildly in his post and pre-match interviews so I'd prefer to listen to Mark Hughes' drivel next season over Coyles'.  He has a good reputation as a manager and is well liked in football circles, but I'm not sure why, he hasn't done a particularly good job at the Reebok and the off the field drama of this season has detracted a bit from the poor on the field performances, style of play and results.

So... for me, this is how I'd like it to finish...

At the top...

1. Manchester City

2. Manchester United

3. Tottenham Hotspur

4. Arsenal (with Chelsea winning the Champions League so Arsenal don't qualify for the Champions League)

5. Newcastle

At the bottom...

Relegated - Bolton

Safe - QPR

It will probably end up completely different to this, but wouldn't be the worst bet in the world.

End of Season round-ups

It's getting close to that time with the end of the Premiership season drawing to it's conclusion this weekend, and the Championship nearly wrapped up after the playoff final and the Champions League final clash in bit over a week.

The review shows will be full of the goals at Old Trafford when United destroyed Arsenal, and then again for when City destroyed United. It will show the tears of the Wolves and Blackburn fans relegated and the t-shirts of support for Suarez (before his 8 game ban), it will have a montage of Fabio Capello's tenure as England boss, and some of Roy Hodgson's head banging antics in the WBA dugout.

Bloggers, journo's and twitterers will all have their say on the season so here is mine...

This is a great time to look back on my good, bad and the ugly for the season.

The good - Papisse Demba Cisse, 'The Cockney Mafia' the 'Toon'.

He's been a revelation for a wonderful Newcastle side this year, with his 9 million pound move in January showing that smart and effective deals can be done in the window and guys that score in German can score in England. His second goal at Stamford Bridge a couple of weeks ago during Newcastle's brilliant 2 nil win has my vote for goal of the season, with Peter Crouch's stunning chest and volley against Manchester City a close second, and Luis Suarez's long distance blast against Norwich picking up the bronze. Cisse has scored remarkable goals since his move, bettering Alan Shearer's record for goals in his first 12 games, NOT an easy feat. Newcastle have been terrific for the majority of the season, and although I think Alan Pardew is a complete weapon, it's hard to argue with the job that he, and the Cockney Mafia have done at St. James, oops, I meant the Sports Direct Arena this season. Will it finish with Champions League football a year after being in the Championship? We will see.  Pardew has done a good job and is in the running for manager of the year, he's not my cup of tea however and I'm interested to see how he fares next season now other teams are aware of Newcastle and they will probably sell some players this summer.

Swansea have been sensational too, and I really enjoyed watching Paul Lambert's Norwich City.




The bad - Liverpool (and Arsenal)

Arsenal haven't been good, like Chelsea and Liverpool this season, when a lot was expected from them. A truly terrible start from them including the refund inducing performance that ended in a 8-2 hammering at Old Trafford where a pissed up Tony Adams would have offered more backbone than the players on show looked like it could end Arsene Wenger's time in charge of the Gunners. He survived and so did they, but without the goals of RVP they wouldn't be anywhere near the Champions League places, and it's only really down to his goals and the poor play of the other teams around them that they are in with a shout. Tottenham should have had 3rd spot, or 2nd sown up. Chelsea have had a mad season sacking AVB, bringing in Di Matteo, winning the FA cup final, losing 3rd, 4th, or even 5th in the league, by solely concentrating on the Champions League final, which they won't win. Arsenal, will be there or there abouts, because they do have the PFA player of the year and golden boot winner RVP (for now at least). Liverpool with that man would probably be where Arsenal are now. Instead they have a 35 million quid caveman who didn't score enough, a Urugyuan superstar who missed 9 games of the season through suspension at a crucial time and fires hot and cold, and a squad of piss-poor players. Everton may well finish above their city rivals this year for the first time in recent memory, fans will blame long cup runs, and bad luck in front of goal this season for not getting more points on the board. 30+ times the Reds have hit the woodwork at home this season, and missed more penalties than anyone else, but so what? You have to get the ball in the net and make your own luck. Dalglish's signings (Adam, Henderson, Downing, Carroll) haven't lived up to expectations or been anywhere near good enough all season. It's back to the drawing board for King Kenny as he finds his team as close to the relegation zone as they are to the Champions league spots. Not good enough for a moneyball inspired team of highly paid players. Without the cup runs (and in truth, even with them) this has been a bad, bad, bad season for Liverpool.




The Ugly - Blackburn Rovers, Steve Kean & Venky's.

Steve Kean has held 'dignity' in the face of torrents of abuse throughout the whole season. Venky's the Indian poultry firm stood firm with him even after protests, sit in's and planes flying over head with messages of distaste for the Scotsman. The Venky's group bought the team with promises of Champions League football within 4 years, they achieved relegation and the hate of most of the home support within 2. The rumour mill had them signing players like Ronaldinho, but instead the agent put in charge of the clubs transfer dealings signed his own son (who is yet to play a first team game), and put one of the men he represents, Steve Kean, in the hot seat. Steve Kean should step down, there is nothing heroic in what he's doing, pledging to stay on. It's been an awful season, he's been an awful appointment and sadly for Blackburn, if it'doesn't make changes, will turn into a truly awful club. All this after good old Jack Walker had helped win them the Premiership in 1995 (still one of only 4 teams - soon to be 5, to do so). Steve Kean said "We're absolutely devastated. The players are numb inside the dressing room" after the turgid defeat to Wigan (who have been excellent over the past 8 games in comparison to Blackburn's hideous form). Kean seems to be 'numb' himself to the reality that surrounds him. As long as he is at the helm and Venky's run the club, there will be a poisonous atmosphere around the club. Kean looked like a drowning rat during Monday night's defeat and subsequent relegation, sadly for Blackburn he doesn't look like he's going to jump ship!
Wolves were crap, Bolton too.